“Should, must…” These words have echoed in my head nonstop for the past few years. I’m enjoying dinner, and suddenly, a thought pops up: “I should go visit my mom.” I’m fully immersed in a movie, then boom – “I must unload the dishwasher.” And the worst of all? I am on vacation, lying on a couch with a book in hand, but my mind is already busy planning next week’s must-do tasks.
Maybe that’s why the book Neurotic Styles by David Shapiro caught my attention so much. A respected psychologist and psychotherapist, Shapiro describes this situation under the category of Obsessive-Compulsive as follows:
“They don’t feel free. In fact, when given even a bit of freedom, they often feel deeply uncomfortable. This is something obsessive-compulsive individuals frequently experience during vacations or travel. When their usual responsibilities, regular duties, and workload are removed, they noticeably feel uneasy, and quickly invent new pressures and tasks for themselves. They don’t feel at ease engaging in any activity that has no purpose or goal beyond simple enjoyment.
Shapiro categorizes neurotic individuals under four main styles, not as “disordered,” but rather as people who live life differently. According to him, neuroses are not simply a set of defined symptoms, as we often think. Instead, they represent a holistic structure that affects how a person thinks, feels, and acts – essentially, a way of coping with life.
According to Shapiro, there are four types of neurotic styles:
- Obsessive-Compulsive Style
- Extremely controlling, rigid, and overly organized
- Creates a semi-external pressure within themselves, constantly issuing “should” and “must” commands
- Lacks spontaneity
- Has a rigid conscience and strong feelings of guilt
- Impulsive Style
- Has difficulty expressing emotions
- Dislikes taking initiative and is passive in decision-making
- Emotionally distant and defensive toward life
- Hysterical Style
- Expressive and dramatic emotional display
- Seeking attention, approval, and affirmation from others.
- Paranoid Style
- Perceives the world as threatening, highly suspicious
- Extremely cautious, hyper-aware, and constantly on alert
- Holds a deeply rooted sense of being right internally
Recognized as a classic in modern psychology, the book offers a detailed look into how people perceive the world and how those perceptions shape their behavior.
Learning by Stealing
Picasso once said, “Good artists copy, great artists steal.”
In his inspiring book Steal Like an Artist: 10 Things Nobody Told You About Being Creative, author Austin Kleon explores creativity, art, and productivity with this exact idea at the core. He encourages readers to take bold steps in their creative journeys. “Every new idea is just a mashup or a remix of one or more previous ideas,” says Kleon, summarizing in 10 points that creativity is not about being entirely original but rather about drawing inspiration from others, and explaining why and how we should imitate art.
Under the chapter “Steal,” he emphasizes that nothing is truly original and that creativity means absorbing ideas from others and expressing them in your own voice. In “Be Boring”, he explains that overstimulated minds can’t think clearly and that boredom gives space for new ideas to emerge.
Kleon believes being an artist isn’t about innate talent but rather about work, attention, and inspiration. To him, the word “Steal” is a call to freedom – a reminder not to wait for permission, but to simply start creating.
If you need a spark to start creating, Steal Like an Artist: 10 Things Nobody Told You About Being Creative offers simple and practical advice you can start applying to your daily life.
